So yesterday, I died during Chinese Os. IT WAS A KILLER PAPER!! Okay, I'm like so screwed.. I told myself time and time again that I must work hard, that I must not give up no matter what, to press on, and to do my VERY best. I don't want to be a disappointment, I don't want to let laoshi, Mum and Dad down, I don't want to screwed myself up more than I'm already. I want to do myself proud, I want to make my teachers and parents proud of who I am and what I've done. I want them to feel that their efforts, time and love are not wasted.
But guess what, Xuanqi, IT DIDN'T WORK OUT. You SCREWED that Chinese paper. I don't know why I'm crying but I just feel that I'm letting everyone down. I'm really sorry to all those who believed in me, I'm sorry for being a disappointment, I'm sorry for not putting in more effort, I'm sorry for always letting you all down. To everyone who wished me Good Luck, thank you. But I'm really sorry for disappointing everyone. I love you all, I'll do my very best. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Words can never express my sorrow. I don't really mind what I get, it's just the disappointment I cause that I can't forgive myself for. I don't know what to feel now, the sense of failure is just so great.
Hold on to that little glimmer of hope..
And then anna jiejie's family came and we had fun! And I reached home at like 10.40pm. And there were like 5 kids scurrying around the house, HAHA. Joss has grown up so much, he's so cute now, hehe. I can still remember how that one-year-old Joss replied me when I asked him if he wanted me to bring him somewhere, '要要要!', haha.. He's so cute. And James has grown so much too, long time no see! He has huge eyes, and the last time i saw him was when airu jiejie was still pregnant with him. And Joan, Joey and Jayden are all grown too! Okay, I had fun whilst fighting for the toilet with them so I could bathe. It's not that I was oozing, but I haven't bathed since the bathe before Os and I was still in school uniform and felt really gross.
YAY, I loved yesterday..
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