Accidents do happen..

Wow, I haven't blogged for quite long already.. A few days ago, there was an accident outside Mum's office and apparently it was a hit-and-run accident. Mum's colleague, from China, was coming out of a taxi to enter the office and the taxi driver was helping to carry the luggage out. Suddenly, a reckless driver hit the taxi and the taxi turned 180 degrees and swung and hit the taxi driver and Mum's colleague. Both fell to the grass patch and Mum ran out of the office to see what happened after she heard the sound. Luckily, the hit-and-run driver got arrested. The taxi-driver was unconscious while Mum's colleague could still talk and tell Mum where was hurting. Unfortunately, the taxi-driver passed away already and Mum showed me the news on the newspaper. I feel so sad for his family and the taxi driver just didn't deserve to die. WHY did he have to die, he was just helping :( and Mum's colleague is still hospitalized and her husband is unable to come to Singapore because he is a government servant in China. I just hope for peace in the taxi-driver's family and that they would be able to cope with the passing and Mum's colleague would get well soon.

I just realize that there are so much homework that I just don't know where to start and I feel so burdened by every single thing on the list that it seems to be never ending. I'm tired.

Itchy itchy

Went to the doctor's today cause the itch is really making me feel so uncomfortable I feel like crying. Really respect those who can tahan this kinda itch cause it's seriously killing me.. Affected my productivity and I feel like crap. WHY does this kind of nonsense infect me NOW?! I feel like dying, argh.. Trying my best not to scratch, arghhhhh

Sharon has been having a breakdown these past few days. Hope she's able to cope with the stress and not put herself down to much. HAHA, to Sharon, if you ever escape your house at 9.30pm to RUN to relieve stress, tell me! I'll go down and maybe run with you? And if you need a listening ear, I'll be here too. I also have these kinda breakdowns and it's difficult to not have anyone who understands and is going through the same thing. Don't bottle everything up kayy, although that's like what I do, but I'll be here for you. LUVYA <3 my going to school buddy

So itchy..

I just got infected with some itch/rash/allergy/whoknowswhat that leaves me so itchy that I can't resist the temptation to scratch. This is horrible, I look like some horrid with all the red spots on me, arghhh.. And the worst thing is that it distracts me a lot from work and I get really pissed with myself for being unproductive. Haizz what should I do now?! I've like no known allergy and rashes rarely attack me so idk what this is.

Next week is like the last week of school!! :( Many memories, many stories, one crescent.

Argh, I don't feel like typing now. The itch is seriously taking a toll on me. This is crap.

ONE OF GOD'S WORKERS

How do you see yourself when you fail, when you completely blow it? Do you spend time thinking about all the ways you failed and that you are only as good as what you didn't do right? What does the enemy whisper in your ear when you've failed? Reminders of how you will never change, never grow? Reminders of the sin you have committed since you became a Christian?

For me, it's the reminders of all the times I've failed and convincing myself that I'm only as good as what I didn't do right. Even though I've tried to put these thoughts aside, the enemy loves to whisper in my ear, tempting me to doubt my salvation, my forgiveness, and my freedom.

Paul has just given the Corinthian church a strong rebuke. He said to them only eight verses earlier that he "could not address you as spiritual people, but as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ." In other words, they are so much like the non-Christian world around them that he can't even speak to them like the people of God, but instead needs to talk to them in baby talk, because they are so immature.

How then could Paul tell these Corinthians that they are God's fellow workers, God's field, and God's building so shortly after? He can tell them this because their identity is not found in what they have done, but what God in Christ did for them. They can be God's fellow workers, field, and building because, as verse 6 says, "God gave the growth.'

God is working through you to build up His kingdom and will use you in whatever way He chooses to be made much of. So, the next time the enemy would seek to whisper lies in your ear, remind him that you have been bought with the blood of Christ and are one of God's workers, a part of His field, and a brick in His building. Jesus will not let the church He is building fail or fall.

EMATH MADE MY DAY :)

Got back Emath today!! Was waiting sooooo super long for it! Glad to say, it brought the BIGGEST shock, and was well worth the wait! Like 85.5/100 mannn!!!!! #immahappykid

Had free period for chem today and there was no Chinese too! Today ended relatively well too, with jokes and fun times at the bus stop and in the train. Never laughed so hard before. Thanks to THE GOING HOME CLIQUE! HAHA, we couldn't think of a better name soyeah.. And I think the name sounds cool too! And there was like 9 out of 10 of the clique, yeah, we rule the world in the train, HAHA

Hope I'm suppressing the feelings well. Still thinking of how to improve on my humanities.. /drowns back in sorrow/

Jess seems to be seriously giving up on her goals. She wants to go to Nanyang now, like WHUT?! That smarty pants is like putting herself down really badly cause she thinks she can't go anywhere with her current L1R5. Celine got like a huge shock when she heard that Jess wants to go to Nanyang or whatever JC I go too. It'll be so cool if we go to the same JC! And I hope Jess is cheering up now, although I know she will usually get over things like really fast.

I feel like poop :(

Got back a few more prelim papers today. Was quite happy with AM, but other than that, I felt horrible. I don't know but this feeling of disappointment and feeling that I've let so many people down is just terrible! :( I'm sorry, I really am. I wanted to make you all happy, but I brought sorrow. I wanted to make you proud, but I brought disappointment. I'm such a disgrace..

I'm feeling really helpless and hopeless and on the verge of giving up on myself. I know I can't give up now, and I hope that this feeling would be suppressed till after Os. There's this feeling of numbness in me and I don't know if anyone can even understand me. I seem to self doubt and self criticize a lot nowadays.. I don't really know what's happening to me :(

This is exactly how I feel now. Argh, this sucks..

I know this post is very emo and I don't usually show this side of me much. Okay, I'll try to make things a little better, I hope..

Had CHAMPION SEMINAR today. It was awesome!! Great catchup time with Delta! Love them loads <3

MARSA MATHRU GROUP PIC!

Before we had our 'feast'

BORN FOR VICTORY, DELTA <3

I'm like trying to bury the feelings deep within myself. Hope it works and I'll trudge on strong..

The day ended real late

Relatives came over yesterday! Picked them up from woodlands quite late.. Slept past midnight as usual.

When to church today and had a great time! Then we went out to eat and eat and eat till about 6pm before we finally arrived back home.. Rested a while and their parents came. Had dinner and played. I carried Joss till my hand's hurting and my muscles have like no strength to even lift my phone up..

End of Sept hols. This is demoralizing and highly horrifying. Os are coming, and obviously nervousness and fear will be inside of you. And getting back prelim papers tomorrow. I'm scared. Just chatted with Jessica AKA DA PRO and yeah.. Chem's first, this is horrid. And we end at 1pm!! Yay, so early!

Faye jiejie's wedding in Dec and I'm like supposed to be the FREAKING BRIDESMAID?!?! Ohh NONONONONO, this can't be happening. Hopefully plans will change since it's not confirmed yet.

Imagine me as the bridesmaid, gosh, I can't even bring myself to imagine. Firstly, I'll most probably burst the dress with all my fats. Next, I wouldn't be able to follow my plans and wear my jeans and sneakers, they're my #ootd :( Don't tell me that I'll have to wear heals, cause I'll most probably trip and fall and embarrass myself. But thinking about it, I won't really have to worry about my clothes cause they will provide everything! Just that I won't look good and probably embarrass myself. But whatever the outcome of the discussion by the adults, I'll just accept my fate.. It'll be the first time I'm doing such a thing and I'll even have the honor of sitting at the 'most honorable people''s table and get served food the first, HAHA YAY!! And maybe just too try things out. Hope that I won't freak anyone out with my hideous looks or embarrass myself my tripping and falling everywhere.

This is demoralizing..

I just received our new timetable thanks to ROYAL ROSELIA ROSE who stole her sister's slate to open the zip file the Principal sent cause it wasn't possible to open it using our phones and I haven't touched the computer in agesss.. Mock test schedule out already, oh the horror

NOT exempted from SS, as expected cause how good can my SS get :( haizz, need to study SBQ. Actually, it's not a lot as compared to SEQ, I guess? And exempted from bio mock, woohoo! But I think I might just go for it, if I have time and have studied that is..

School's starting soon. I feel scared, fear, insecurity, uncertainty as to what to expect.. Os is coming so super soon :( and graduation :'( Just reminds me, I haven't prepared graduation gifts :(

I'm getting FAT :(

Today was quite normal. Went out to the library to study with Kiren but she was spazzing over stuff which I can never comprehend, and I guessed she just needed a listening ear, so I just listened and replied 'okay' where appropriate.. I don't even know what she's spazzing about, HAHA and I spent most of the time doing my work that I don't even know when she's talking, HAHA, sorry, I'm horrible! :( and she'll get the hint and get back to work.

Mum said that I'm getting fat! What does one expect from a person like me who does minimal exercise and eats like some pig?!

HAHA, pooh bear!!

SEP HOLS 2013

Today was relatively a mix of good and bad I guess? Yeah, there were distractions and I kinda fell for a few, AND I FELT TERRIBLY STUPID ABOUT IT!! :(

Bro made me laugh so hard just now, or maybe it wasn't him and that I just went high. Yeah, got scolded cause I was hysterical and disturbing his process of homework, so I had to do the dishes :( Gotta admit that I'm horrible at housework..

Relatives coming over for the weekend! I'm super excited, but I think I'll have to be coped up in the room.. :( And it'll be so super noisy that I don't think concentration would be even possible, haizz.. Hope it'll be a productive weekend

What's a holiday?

September holidays are here.. And I'm not excited one bit. Haven't posted for a while now and I don't think anyone reads this, but ohwells, I shall post for myself to read.

Last week was slack. Too slack. After Monday's exam, we went home, which was about 12nn? Ended at 12.30pm and 12.45pm on Tuesday and Wednesday. Thursday was Teachers' Day, so ended at 11+ and Friday was FREE. So the week a whole was just slack.

And I can't believe it's September holidays already. Time flies just tooooo fast. We're gonna graduate so super soon, argh, I'm gonna miss everyone :( Been thinking about Graduation gifts recently.

ALERT: the creep is back in action!!

Didn't talk to him for super long now, and ever since he saw me at the bus stop after teacher's day, things are getting weirder.. Luckily meimei was going home with me so I'd just ignore him or pretend he didn't exist, but my poor phone took the rap for me. But argh, he's getting grosser and I'm just ignoring cause I really don't know what to do.. Someone has got to save me outta this crap!

Hoping that the holiday would be productive. It's the last lap, hope I won't let anyone down..